Today I received an interesting review on one of the male/male romance stories I wrote. Normally I write straight sensual romance, but once in awhile I do like to experiment with gay relationships, probably because I am a big fan of Yaoi manga and anime. Anyway, this reviewer (who happens to be a part of an extensive writing group I am involved in) wrote the following review of my story:
“This is rape! The younger guy was taken advantage of by an older man, even if he enjoyed it anal sex is disgusting. Next time you should only show frontal sex. Great job though!” The review had a rating attached to it as well – 5 stars, the best that can be given through the group’s rating system. Which left me wondering, if he thought the story was disgusting and immoral, why in the world did he say that I did a great job and give me 5 stars?
The reviewer went on to explain that although he thinks gay sex is fine, anal sex is just taking it too far. Of course, my first thought was ‘what the hell’? Gay sex is fine but anal sex is disgusting? How does that even make sense? And what did he mean by saying I should only show frontal sex in the future? Anybody have a clue on that one?
Also, for the record, the story was far from a rape because I do not write rapes. I will admit there was persuasion and seduction involved, but people should remember that sensual romance or erotica is about fantasies, not necessarily what we would do in real life. I do not agree with taking anyone against their will or harming another person, so please do not think I am in favor of those things, but if we can’t fantasize a little bit, what’s the use?
The whole encounter left me scratching my head a little bit and feeling discouraged by the homophobia that is obviously still a big part of our society. Even some of my fellow writers who write gay romance admit that their husbands are homophobes…seems odd doesn’t it?
It also seems like men are generally more homophobic than women, anyone have a clue why that is? Is it because they feel that accepting and befriending gay males will damage their own masculinity? If so, it makes you wonder how insecure they are in the first place. Of course, I am just taking a shot in the dark there, so if you have a theory or insight into this subject, please feel free to leave a comment!